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TV Died-Monday Night

6:00 PM

ZBS News--News
Network news doing all they can in 30 minutes despite the fact that cable does a better job covering them anyway.
Let's Make a Quiche--Game
MBC News--News
Must see news here!
Wolf News--News
A youthful alternative to news, but they're watching Knuckelodeon News instead.
American Canned Stand--Music
XYZ News--News
Puppets are the newscasters here.
Two and A Half Morons--Sitcom
The X-Men Kill The Teletubbies--Violent Cartoon
Family Movie--Drama
Heidi buys the Oakland Raiders from the NFL and pre-empts them from television permanently. Drew Barrymore stars.
Mr. Whizbang's World--Education?
Mr. Whizbang demonstrates how static cling can power a nuclear submarine, life in the four states that never ratified the laws of gravity, what your TV set dreams about when its off, how rain clouds can sense that you've washed your car, commen garden vegetables that can talk, but have nothing interesting to say.
Step by Step--Brady Bunch Ripoff
Carol and the girls build a clubhouse. Oops, that was stolen from "The Brady Bunch."
The Bionic Collie-Crime Drama
Laser, the Bronx canine, again meets her old foe, the bionic mailman. This show is a real dog.
Monday Night Revoluition--War Sports
a classic game originally aired in 1776, Howard Cosell calls the battle between the underdog Colonials, led by Joltin' George Washington, as they take on the veteran British Redcoats in a fight to the finish. Watch as Coloniels' star Benedict Arnold play out his option and joins the Redcoats. Stick with the actionas Washington's raging team pulls a stunning upset.
The Brady Bunch--Comedy
The Bradys finally find their lost dog Tiger...dating a transvestite Lassie!
Family Dinner Argument--Family Feud
Dad gets steaming mad while the mom screams at the kids. Strong language, possible violence.

6:30 PM

Who Do We Appreciate?--Comedy
Win Ben Stein's Monkey--Game
That 70's Program--Insipid Teen Com
Married...With Children--Sitcom
Al Bundy trades Bud, Kelly and Peg for the Baywatch girls!
The O.J. Simpsons--Cartoon Court Comedy
Stop In For A Slurpee!--Game
Entertainment Fake News--Gossip
Let's All Throw Up!--Game
Explode This--Instructional
Learn how to blow up your gas furnaces safely.
Bowling For Pennies--Sports
The Jeffersons-Comedy
Whimsical, sophmoric humor finds its way into the Jefferson household when another token white is added to the cast.
The Brady Bunch--Comedy
Peter loses his virginity...all by himself!

7:00 PM

60 Menudos--Pre-Teen Boy Group
14-16 year-old investigators intended to report fluff pieces, but designed to get huge ratings from the pre-teen female demographic, raising their hopes that they will eventually marry one of them.
Shoplifting Sweep--Game
Contestants are let loose inside a Wal-Mart and attempt to shoplift as much merchandise as they could and get to the door without getting caught by store security.
Have Pun Will Travel--Western
Name That Goon--Game
Entertainment Too Light--Tabloid Journalism
Padres Baseball--Sports
The Padres vs. Roger Hedgecock
Beverly Hills 90210--Middle-Age Teen Serial
Donna finally loses her virginity and gives herself to the man she's been holding out for after all these years...Bill Clinton!
Wheel of Misfortune--Game
Three contestants spin the wheel to see who has the worst luck in life. The biggest loser gets a free IRS tax audit.
Want Fries With That?--Game
Let's Make a Meal--Game
I Hate Lucy--Sitcom
Roberto Amorosa en Agua Caliente!--In Spanish
How To Read A Stop Sign--Instructional
Samarai TV Repairman--Comedy
Merv Griffin Show--Variety
Guests: Opie, Don Knotts, Aunt Bee, and Ron Howard. Sponsored by Rinute On Ice. Great with Tang!
Inaudible City Council Meeting--Public Access
Wheel of Fish--Game
It's a Ripoff!--Discussion
The high costs of NFL TV contracts is discussed.
Sister Mary Elephant--Sitcom
Stars a substitute teacher teaching a different set of rowdy students in the toughest parts of Brooklyn's high schools.
Gumby--Clay Toon
Chaos engulfs Gumbyville as Mrs. Gumby catches her husband with the Pillsbury Doughboy. Mr. Bill co-stars.
Pork and Mindy-Comedy
The Waltons--Drama
The whole family is shattered when they discover that their mountain home is on a studio parking lot.
The Brady Bunch--Comedy
It's The World Series vs. The Bradys as the men are pitted against the women for the battle to control the channel selection in the Brady household.
Wash The Dishes--Family Chore

7:30 PM

Grand Theft Auto--Game
Contestants are let loose in a mall parking lot in a ritzy part of town, and steal as many expensive cars, like Mercedes-Benzes, BMW's, Lexuses, Porsches. and Rolls Royces as they could. The loser is stuck stealing the Yugo-and getting caught.
Stanford and Son--Junk Sitcom
Hard Floppy--Newsmagazine?
Investigators try to get to the bottom of the story when they discover Bill Gates plotting to make all 1.44" floppies obsolete unless they upgrade to his Windopes 97 OS.
We're High at Twelve O'Clock--Drug Smuggling Adventure
Idiot Jeopardy!--Game
Where contestants with very low IQs get to compete.
Merv Griffin's Crossdressers--Game
The Hollyweird Squares--Game
Hogan's Cowards--Sitcom
The Persons Court--Judge Waffle Whiffer
The MacDonald/Burger Report--News or Fast Food?
MBA Basketball--Sports
The Los Angeles Rivers take on the family of Albert Gore
Lucy Loves Ricky!--Comedy
Sitcom where Lucy hosts her own variety show, but Ricky keeps getting into her show with his schemes.
What If...--Discussion
See how history would be changed if The Beatles met Nervous Norvous.
They're Coming To Take Me Away, Ha-Haaa!--Comedy
Starring Jack Nicholson as the man in a strait-jacket on the funny farm. This one flies over the cuckoo's nest every week!
Felix the Cat--Cartoon
Felix's magic bag of tricks fails in a critical situation, so all of his nine lives get exhausted.
One Day at a Time-Comedy
Barbara's cuteness tirades eventually overwhelm her sister Julie as she becomes so nauseated at her that she throws up all over the apartment.
David Tanny stars as Mr. Bore who plans to rule the world by boring people to death with his stupid web reports, and only Batman and Robin can stop him!
ZHL Hockey--Violent Sports
The New York Arrogants take on Mike Tyson and Don King, but dinner breaks out instead of a fight.
The biography on "Phil Donahue" is told as a story of a man who was born with gray hair, but managed to became a successful talk show host who married a liberal woman with jet black hair; this girl? No, That Girl, Marlo Thomas! Peter Graves as Phil Donahue, Susan Lucci as Marlo Thomas middle age, Valerie Bertineli as Marlo, post-teenage.
The Brady Bunch--Comedy
Bobby's grades take a nosedive when a beautiful student played by Justine Bateman transfers to his campus. After Mike scolds Bobby for his bad grades, Bobby considers joining "Family Ties" to marry Justine.
Hit The Showers--Family Hygiene

8:00 PM

Suddenly Cosby--Comedy
Kids' Eye For The Grown Guy--Reality Series
Five elementary school age kids transform the father of one of the kids...they teach the guy the fine art of making mud pies, eating candy and ice cream, playing with ships and rubber duckies in the bath, making the room and house messy, dressing like a kid, and studying the fine art of Sesame Street, Barney, and the Rugrats.
Slopalong Cassidy--Western
Susan in the City--Comedy
Boyfriends Who Are Girls--Comedy
Morons Place--Rude Serial
Real Humans in Real Pain--Reality
The Fat Patrol--Adventure
UFL Monday Night Football--Sports
Tonight, it's a matchup as the New York Biggies take on Godzilla at Japan.
Queer As Fake--Reality Series
Actors who are straight in real life try to act gay and make Pittsburgh a gay paradise. This week's episode has Brian getting sick off the Liberty Diner's lemon bars, while Michael, the diner owner's son and his best friend, gets him to the hospital. Brian then gets more than he expected from the doctor. Justin gets arrested for painting an anti-homophobia poster on the wall of the police station, and Ted's porn site gets hacked by homophobes after getting it back online months after it got shut down. Melanie's baby is born-it's a girl.
Jerks--Geek Comedy
7th Hell--Family Horror Series
Where My Wife At?--Comedy
The classic monster flick, "Godzilla Conquers the Smurfs!"
Veronica From Mars--Space Adventure
Kristen Bell plays a Martian with superhero powers who comes to Earth to save the world from alien Neptunites who plan to take over the planet.
The Unwatchables--Comedy
Whoomp! Donde Esta?--In Spanish
Public Toilets On The Highways--Special
Tonight's special, "Public Toilets On The Highways", is a documentary questioning whether its a pride or a flushing embarrassment.
Stupidstation Baseball--Sports
The Atlantic Bravos vs. The San Diego Zoo
tonight on "Kremlins", Yakov Smirnoff stars as a Russian whose home is invaded by little creatures that make his life miserable.
That's Impossible!--Reality Show
An army tank attempts to jump over a bus, A.J. Foyt tries to stop his 200mph racecar on a dime, a Yogi attempts to put a Cadilliac inside his mouth, and Fran Tarkenton tries to put a stop plug on Howard Cosell's mouth.
Blurry Steve--Public Access
The French Prince of Bel-Air--Comedy
A hospital sitcom about doctors and blood donating and administrating.
Tonight on the animated flick "Bambi II: The Sequel", Bambi gets shot and killed by a hunter and barbecued in this touching sequel to the classic.
The Young Morticians--Comedy
two undertakers operate a private-eye agency out of their funeral home.
BJ and The Monkees--Comedy-Adventure
Nobody can tell the difference between the animal or the rock group.
Little House on the Prarie--Drama
Pa Ingalls notices something strange on his farmland. Bugs Bunny pops in from his underground tunnel.
Eight is Enough--Dramedy
The children are flabberghasted when Tom adopts Gary Coleman from "Diff'rent Strokes"
Very Real People--Magazine
A man who works at a major oil company plant and gets really oily working the wells. An ex-actor who became the president of a major nation. A man who insists he's seen Star Wars 2000 times.
Abbott and Costellrock--Comedy
Mr. Popeil's Collection Of Mail-Order TV Ads--Infomercial
Mr. Popeil sells a Rubik's Cube as a collector's item that you must buy.

8:30 PM

The Queen of Kings--Comedy
Mad About Friends--Comedy
Girlfriends Who Are Guys--Comedy
Feral Dingoes Eating Children on Tape--Reality
Felony Squid--Crime Drama
Gittin' Yo Freak On--Comedy
Voyage To The Bottom Of The Ratings--Comedy
Do We Have A Caller On The Line? Hello?--Public Access
Monster M*A*S*H--Comedy
Takes place in Korea with monster doctors in the 7044th unit during the early 1950s war.
Oxygen, Please--Sitcom
Hijinks are abound in abundance in a hospital's zany intensive care unit wher fatalitles take a back seat to fun.

9:00 PM

Murphy Brown--Comedy
Candace interviews Michael Jackson, but trouble ensues when Michael falls in love with her baby!
Jungle Love--Nature
A full hour of wild animals, as well as domestic dogs and cats, "doing it like they do on the Discovery Channel". Untamed and uncensored.
The Burpginian--Western
Suddenly Frasier--Comedy
One Guy with Several Female Friends--Comedy
23 1/2--Drama
The cast waste 23 1/2 hours until they deliver all of their payload for the 1/2 hour afterwards.
Jiggle It Beach--Reality
Dumbat--War Adventure
Jerry Stinger--Shock Talk Show?
Jerry has a new secret weapon-a stinger gun that delivers a shock to anyone fighting on the stage. Today's topic: "My father is a cross dressing prostitute".
Zeroes--Serial Adventure
Hyperion Bay Watch--Beach Soap Opera
Me & My Psychic--Comedy
Star Trek: Voyager--Space Adventure
The crew go where no man has really gone before...into the homes of viewers!
Theoretically Existing Show--Comedy
Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooal!--In Spanish
PSB Monday Night Movie--History
In the movie "The President Wore Skirts", Woodrow Wilson in the late 1910s becomes seriously ill and his wife takes over the business...which happens to be the President Of The United States.
Lottery Numbers Announced Now!--Audience Paying To Participate
The Best Of Lunch Menus--Public Access
Psycho Chicken--Horror
A horror anthology about a dead chicken who hunts for people with an axe every week.
A hot new show about an elite unit of environmental cops that fights to keep the world's beaches clean
The Undertakers--Crime Drama
A new show where they fight crooked insurance companies, greedy real estate brokers, anyone who preys on their grieving families, all while giving them the best burial for their money.
Lifeline Movie--Drama
"How Can I Choose Between My Daughters?"
It's Like (a Surgeon), You Know...--Comedy
Scheduled Topic: Wanna-be talk show hosts.
Eight is Enough--Dramedy
It's the Energy Crisis Gone Amok as the family tries to adjust to year-round daylight saving time mandated by the government, but Tom's biting editorial against the time change causes the FBI to investigate.
Automobile Accident--Traffic Collision
Each week, two cars collide in the worst intersection in the city.
Married...With Cavekids--Sitcom

9:30 PM

Everybody Screws Raymond--Comedy
Just Shoot Caroline--Comedy
My Gay Friends--Comedy
L.A. Chicks--Reality
Kids Suck The Darndest Things--Comedy
Praying For Syndication--Comedy
Funny Farm--Comedy
Bob Newhart and his wife Bernadette Peters inherit an insane asylum in Vermont and try to manage it themselves. With Christopher Lloyd, Richard Simmons, "Weird Al" Yankovic", Napoloeon XIV and Crazy Ernie as their inmates.
(Waffle) King of the Hill--Comedy
Pop Tart Videos--Music
Video's Include Strawberry and Brown Sugar Cinnamon Thanks to Donald Kapica.

10:00 PM

Chicago Hope--Drama
The Chicago Cubs are terminally out of the pennant race and it's up to the staff to help them pull through.
The Sopranos, Tenors, and Baritones--Mobster Drama
Opera singers by day, mobsters by night. Tonight's episode features a mob shootout on the set of "La Boheme" because Tony Soprano didn't like Bobby Baritone's singing voice.
Wyatt Burp--Western
The Naked Frasier--Adult Comedy
Friends You Wish You Had But Don't--Comedy
The X-Files--Sci-Fi Drama
Mulder and Scully track a legendary figure that has roamed across the country for over twenty years since his supposed death...Elvis Presley!
Beverly Hills 90210: The 90,210th Episode--Reality
The Screwgitive--Adventure
Andy Gibb: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills--True Hollywood Tale
CSI: Smurf Village--Cartoon Crime Lab Drama
Dawson's Clothes--Drama
"Beach Blanket Bravo": A pretty girl upset with her boyfriend picks Johnny as her method of revenge. The boyfriend challenges Johnny to a surfing contest. Even though Johnny wins, he still doesn't get the girl.
Star Drek: Annexed Variation--Science Fiction Space Opera
Weasley fills the Ten-Forward sugar bowl with Nanites. (thanks to John Giudice)
The Last Thing You'd Ever Want To Sit Through--Drama
Ai! Ai! Ai! Ai! Ai!--In Spanish
UHL Hockey--Sports
The L.A. Kings vs. Hercules and Xena
"Bare Ambition". Tanya Roberts.
Charlene Tilton Presents--Anthology
the esteemed star of Dallas fulfills her ambition to bring classics to TV and play such roles as Camille and Lady Macbeth.
My Friend Made This Short Film--Public Access
Cows With Guns--Western
A mad cow anthology targeting slaughterhouse humans.
The family flick, "101 Dalmations Run Loose and Relieve Themselves All Over New York City!"
Home Demolishment--Comedy
Charlie's Angels-Crime Drama
Kelly, Kris, and Sabrina go through the entire show without showing any clevage.
Miniature Golf--Sports
Japan battles Russia in a rematch of their WWII battle.
Judging (Airline) Amy--Drama
Has-Beens and Obscurities--Talk
A bunch of nobodies and former supernovas talk about their faded careers in acting. Host: Todd Bridges.
Eight is Enough--Dramedy
Nancy finds a new job, but Tom really explodes when he finds out that her job is hosting Real People, the show that beat their show in the ratings!
Medical Bloopers, Bleeps and Blunders--Footage Videos
Real doctors operating on real patients, but gaffes can happen with disasterous results. The humor is in their faces when they are served legal papers for a malpractice suit. Watch the court trial as the patient eventually wins the case.
Melrock Place--Drama
Duran Duran Video--Music
The video channel stars star in their first full-length video advanture "Duran Duran in Rio", filmed on location, with no plot, just good looking men in a great-looking place to vacation.

10:30 PM

Veronica's Out of the Closet--Gay Comedy
Padres Baseball--Sports
The Padres vs. The San Diego Chicken
Men With Braids Speak Out--Public Access
in "Viva Seattle", Frasier tries to add some excitement to his love life by making himself over in the image of Roz's extroverted new boyfriend. Frasier: Kelsey Grammer. Jimmy Wayne Hobbit: Elvis Presley.
Blank Screen--Hard-Hitting Adventure
Nothing happens.
Men At Work--Music
Construction workers, coal miners, and farmers performing music to the video music of The Village People.

11:00 PM

Celebrity Burlesque--Variety
A weekly show where popular female movie, TV, and music stars "take it all off" in front of a bunch of horny, dirty old men in a seedy dive in the red light district, for charity. This week: Britney Spears. Upcoming weeks: Paris Hilton, Madonna, Christina Aguliera, and Halle Berry.
Annie Croakley--Western
Peyton Per View Place--Serial
Xena: Warrior Princess--Adventure
Xena is nearly crushed to death after a rainstorm that causes her leather dress to shrink.
La Hora de Goya--In Spanish
Pencils Galore!--Documentary
Part 16 of 123: The wide varieties of erasers used on the tops of pencils.
Under Scrutiny With Whimsical Will--Demented News
A news show where he spends 30 minutes with one demented topic expanded as if it really needed to.
Not Now, Let Me Finish My Eggs!-Comedy
In "Love Me Tender". Racing to respond to reports of a beached whale, the Baywatch team discovers instead a down-and-out former rock 'n' roller who has passed out on the sand. Guest cast: Purvis Penkins: Elvis Presley.
Anvil Tossing World Championships--Sports
See wimpy weaklings battle fruitlessly.
Cat scratch fever engulfs Alexis and Krystle as they cat fight over Chicago Hope and ER, Sammy Jo is arrested for moonlighting for T.J. Hooker, Steven sends love letters to Elton John, Jeff and Fallon threaten to get their own series on another network if Blake divorces Krystle and weds Leona Helmsley.
(Here's) Johnny Bravo--Variety Talk Show
Jerry Springer--Full-Contact Discussion
Topic: "My Dog Wants To Become A Cat!"
Eight is Enough--Dramedy
Nicholas reaches puberty, but gets in trouble in junior high when one of the girls asked him in class to erect a tent, and Nicholas gets confused!
Miss or Mister World Pagent--Variety
Gays, lesbians, transvestites, transsexuals, bisexuals, hermaphordites, and Dennis Rodman compete for the most beatuiful blend of man-woman, or should it be woman-man, in the world. Howard Stern, Richard Simmons and Ellen DeGeneres co-host. Songs by k.d. lang and Melissa Etheridge.
House Shopping Network--Infomercial
Featured items included junk they couldn't get rid of last night. (All Night) Thanks to Rik Anthony K-Hits 96FM
Beaver and Butthead--Crude Cartoon

11:30 PM

Late Show With David Letterman--Talk
Tonight: Stupid Talk Show Host Tricks, Richard Simmons annoys us again, and Hootie and the Blowfish return once again.
"The Three Stooges Host a Late Night Program"
Tonight Show with Jay Leno--Talk
Jay reads some headlines that were likely made that way on purpose intended for mail submission by the fans in order to get free publicity on a major network show without paying the advertisement fee.
Arsenio Hill--Variety
Dick Clark's Rockin' Hanukkah Eve--Music
Ted Koppel goes on vacation, so the anchor post is filled with lookalike Alfred E. Newman from M*A*D Magazine, but nobody notices the difference.
"Abbott and Costello Meet Jay and Dave"
The Midnight Star--Tabloid News
A nightly tabloid show produced by the friends of "Weird Al"
The Frantics--Comedy

12:00 MID

"Gunfight at the Not-So-OK Corral"
Politically Incorrect--Discussion
Scheduled: John F. Kennedy, Marilyn Monroe, Elvis Presley, and Robespierre join Bill Maher in a discussion of the day's events.
South East North West Park--Foul Mouthed Cartoon
tonight on the flick "Vampire Dogs", the canines turn on their masters in this horror tale of dog-gone battiness.
All Night Time--Educational
To fill in the back side of the PSB broadcast schedule, they schedule All Time all night long. Discussions concern why decimal minutes will never succeed among other matters. Thanks to Rik Anthony K-Hits 96FM
tonight on the remake of "The Crying Game", Eddie Murphy stars as a john who picks up a hooker, then discovers a surprise!
The Weird Al Show--Children
Midnight With Wildman Fisher--Variety
A 60 minute variety-comedy talk show where he sings a popular song acapello every night.
Vega$-Crime Drama
Dan Tanna investigates why the Olsen twins don't both show up at the same time. Oops, I'm sorry, that should be under "Full House" with dad Danny Tanner. Sorry.

12:30 AM

Tom Snyder--Talk
Tom interviews Renee Richards who plugs her new book "Tennis Without Balls".
Late Night with Conan O'Brien--Talk
Conan interviews Bobcat Goldthwait who sets Conan on fire. Conan is ok, but Bobcat is knocked out cold by Conan's club in self defense.
C*R*E*E*P*S--Monster Reality Cop Show
Politically Incorrect with Mr. Bill Maher--Discussion
The play-doh host is continuously mangled by guest panelsts Dr. Sluggo, Senator Hands, Pamela Anderson and Gerald Ford.
Space Ghost: The Next Generation--Adult Cartoon
Crushed by an Angel--Comedy-Drama
The late Chris Farley stars as a heavy angel who helps a struggling anoretic female drummer cope with dying by making her brother do VH-1 specials. (60 minutes and 120 lbs) Thanks to Rik Anthony for that one.

1:00 AM

When Animals Mount Others or Relieve Themselves--Real Life Film
See videotaped animals doing what comes naturally!
Dick Had It--Cancelled Talk Show
Aqua Teen: SVU--Adult Cartoon
Funny Videos--Music

1:30 AM

Craig Ferguson--Talk
Craig Fergusion interviews leftover guests from Dave and Tom's shows.
"The Three Stooges Convert to Judaism"
Later with Greg Kinnear--Talk
Greg Kinnear of Later interviews ...... Greg Kinnear of Talk Soup. It had to happen sooner or later.
Drawn Apart--Adult Cartoon
"Abbott and Costello Come Out Of The Closet"

2:00 AM

"The Midnight Cowboy Pimps The Hollywood Hos"
America's Most Wanted Mugshots--Reality
Audience members vote for their favorite various mugshots from around the nation, as submitted by local police departments.
Bad Movies All Night!--Til Dawn, We Hope

2:30 AM

Midnight Football League--Sports
The Oakland Pirates at the Pittsburgh Raiders in a late night football game for people who just can't get enough of football (tape delay in the West Coast)

3:00 AM

3:30 AM

"The Three Stooges Become Surgeons"
"Abbott and Costello Feud Over The Cable Remote"

4:00 AM

"Brokeback Canyon"

4:30 AM

5:00 AM

5:30 AM

Schedule Occupation Grid from 6pm-6am

What channel slots are filled. The channels not listed haven't been implemented yet.
6pm-7pm, 7:30-2am
6pm-7pm, 8pm-10pm
6pm-6:30, 7:30-2am
6pm-11pm, MID-2am
7pm-9:30pm, 10pm-11pm
7pm-8:30pm, 11:30pm-12:30am, 2am-6am
7pm-8pm, 9pm-6am
8pm-8:30pm, 9pm-9:30pm, 10pm-11pm
8pm-9pm, 11pm-MID

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